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Elli Stassinopoulos

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What do you remember about the day she died?

Agapi Stassinopoulos
The way she died was so typical. She had fallen and was sitting on the floor in a large dressing room in our house. I fear she'd die if I didn't call the paramedics. But she kept saying no, "I'm fine." A nurse came instead and we continued to sit there.she asked me to open a bottle of red wine and pour glasses for everyone. We all sat there, chatting and telling stories, for an hour or more, waiting for her to get up. There she was on the floor with a beautiful turquoise sarong wrapped around her, making sure we were all having a good time. It sounds surreal now, and it was surreal even then. I had the sense that something larger was moving all of us, keeping us from taking any action, so that my mother would have the chance to pass the way she wanted to pass. When I look back, it’s as if Spirit was saying, Relax—there’s nothing you need to do. We’ve got her now. Then suddenly her head fell forward and she was gone.

Later, I found out my mother had confided to the housekeeper that she knew she had suffered a stroke and her time had come. She asked her not to tell us, and the housekeeper, who had known and loved my mother for years, understood why and honored her wishes. My mother knew that we would insist on getting her to the hospital, and she didn’t want to die in the hospital. She wanted to be at home, with her daughters and her precious granddaughters around her, in the warmth of those she loved and who loved her.

She didn’t want to miss the moment.